paraschiva florescu

loosen into presence

Learn to grasp the transient nature of things. You can never completely recreate the past, no matter how hard you try to push soul back into things that have already died. Let them die. Anchor yourself into what is being birthed for you now. Each joy in its intensity, each moment is here just forContinue reading “loosen into presence”

Romanian Diaries: home within

Part II Today, I arrive at my grandparents’ meagre home in a small village. I see my ninety year old grandfather after a decade. My eyes crack open with tears of joy as his palms feel my face, my cheeks, perhaps he is checking whether I am real. Am I really here? He is oldContinue reading “Romanian Diaries: home within”

Romanian Diaries: Homecoming

Part I Arriving I honour the women from my land, women that fought their way through the wars of their men. Who fought silently, with no guns to carry and bullets to load, but with bread baking and blisters on their knees from so much praying. This, I do for them. I return after soContinue reading “Romanian Diaries: Homecoming”

Two

Choosing the world as much as choosing it not. Always grappled with the in-between. Not quite there, in one fully or the other. Migrating like a bird, or swinging like a mad pendulum from one to the other. A neurosis of some sort, yearning for intensity in both. I want to feel it deeply, madly.Continue reading “Two”

Him

Morning. Hot tears singe. How many times have I been told to stop crying? It’s not good for the soul, they’d hiss. Fools. Now I want to drown them in these tears. Blazing lava, abundant. Nevermind. I’m lost in your love yet I find neither you nor me. I wonder – the shape of yourContinue reading “Him”

Fools

how do you receive this rage without it burning through your skin without wishing for annihilation. my skin is made of hot dark coal I want to burn the whole world with my body. and when they ask where do you feel the pain? – i tell them the whole world hurts inside me likeContinue reading “Fools”

I do this for you

I do this for you, little girl concealed under a folding of the heart. Shrinking is no longer an option. I reach down, squeeze my hand through the roots my past, under the ground, I reach down to find you. Pull you upwards by your neck. I look at you whisper I love you This Continue reading “I do this for you”

my home hurts

Start packing, we’re leaving next week. I was fourteen when I watched my home shrink and disappear from the round window of a cramped plane. Friends, music band, teachers, family, home, fields, mountains, grandmother, streets, language, dog – all left behind, becoming smaller, and disappearing as I trudged with a heavy suitcase. My face wasContinue reading “my home hurts”

re birthing

when i crave for you most i find myself at sea this time i’m going in knee deep naked exposed to skin skin moistening into the sea bed like moss i am now a sea shell empty dry sand particles lodged between my toes i sink i go down with purpose salt seeps through theContinue reading “re birthing”

Lot’s wife

I am on the floor, by the fire. Spread out, being held by the hard floor underneath. The wood is crackling, popping. I feel my bones warming up, my feet are almost burning. I am seven years old. My father sits across – on his armchair. One night two men arrived at Lot’s door. InContinue reading “Lot’s wife”